Three Little Words

"I love you teacher." Robbie said looking up at me with his blue eyes as we were finishing up snack. Such big words for such a little guy. This four year old doesn't have any idea how much more hope he gave me that school day when he said those words to me. Some days are better than others in the life of a preschool teacher. I love to teach and see the kids learning and enjoying themselves; Yet, the kids aren't always listening or paying attention. I try not to let this discourage me, they are just little, they don't know! It's funny how whenever I tell people I am a preschool teacher I almost get the same response: "Aw! How cute! It must be so fun working with the little ones, you never have to grow up! You must be SO patient."

I find this funny because I used to think I was a patient person and that it was one of my strong points, until two things happened in my life: I became a preschool teacher and I got married. Sometimes I think if I hear "Teacher! Teacher! Teacher!" One more time, I think I am going to go crazy. I can imagine how Mom's must feel when they hear, "Mom! Mommy! Mama!" Over and over again and all day long. It's hard to keep my sanity when a handful of little ones want my attention all at one time. Other days, I try to look on the bright side of things and think how awesome it is that I am put in such a position that the kids look up to me, want to interact with me, and act as if I am the best thing 'since sliced bread'. (that saying is thanks to my grandma, the first time I heard it I thought SHE was the funniest thing since sliced bread).

Its great actually, the little ones laugh at everything I say, sing all the songs I sing, and want to ask me all kinds of questions. They act as though I am, for two and half hours and three days a week, the most interesting person they have ever encountered. Who wouldn't want that?

The kind of problems one shall encounter when in the profession of being a preschool teacher is that you must know the words to the songs you are singing so that that they in turn, shall know them as well. For example: With Christmas coming up, it is my job to teach my kids in my class all the songs they will be singing for the Christmas program. I know it doesn't sound like much, but it being my first year of teaching, I need to know the songs, so I can teach it to them. The problem is, I am learning as I go as well. I am doing my best. I have been listening to the Christmas program cd in my car. Yes, I am singing Christmas songs in November before Thanksgiving, but I don't really have much of a choice.

Another problem with learning as you go is making sure I am always prepared for class, even though I am an assistant for another class in the afternoon and have to be ready for that class. I'm attempting to find the balance so I don't continue to forget the kids birthdays and not have any thing written in my teacher planner for my "circle times". Usually I wing it, but I don't just want to get through my circle times with my kids, I want to have fun with the stories, make them smile, and be creative with the time I do have with them; so that they are learning and experiencing Jesus' love through me with the time that we have together.

Being patient and being married is a whole other story! My husband is the most patient person I know--so much in fact that he puts me thinking I am patient, to shame. I say this in the most light hearted way because it is actually funny how laid back and go with the flow my husband is. Being with him has made me notice things about myself that I never noticed about myself before. A few of those things being: I worry way more than I should, I am not as easy going as I thought, and I am quite the planner. There is something satisfying about writing things down in my planner. I am not one of those who have an i phone just yet, so I am not sure how satisfying of an experience it will be to use a touch screen instead of a pen. We'll see. But I must say, that because of Justin, I am not much of a worrier (I don't like the term "worry wort"), than I used to be. And for that, I am extremely thankful.

My inspiration, I must say, goes to little Robbie-- Who really has no idea how much that meant to me when he said three little words. It's all about perspective, and it shifted when he spoke those heart changing words to me because I realized, I am here for the kids, not for me or for the projects, or even for the Christmas songs! I am here for them, and in turn for Jesus in me, who will reach their little hearts :)

Stop talking about it

In hopes of giving myself a goal of writing at least one post every day and revamping my blog; I will start writing consistently--which is really what I am suppose to be doing. It is what has been ingrained in me for so long and spoken over me: Write Melissa! Write!

I actually am not really quite sure why I am suppose to be writing and why it is so important, yet God keeps telling me to share. I really do have so much to share, but I just don't know where to begin. I just started this book that I got at a book store at Bethel Church while visiting Redding, CA. It was quite an expansive book, and Justin put all his other books back that he wanted in order for me to get this pricey book. Which I thought was very kind and thoughtful of him. He is always so encouraging of my writing, even though he doesn't exactly know the extent of it or how it's all really going to turn out, yet he still cheers me on. Anyway, this book that I got should be a good start to what I actually want to accomplish: WRITING A BOOK. But not only writing a book but publishing a book...eventually. This book has the seemingly uncommon title of: "How to Write and Publish Your Book." By Aaron McMahon. What drew me to this book was not just the boring title, but the fact that that boring title, was on my mind...How do I actually write and publish my own book? I mean how do I get this thing started??? I really had no idea, I just knew it was on my heart and mind and that it was my next goal that I was attempting to achieve.

What REALLY drew me in to actually opening the book and considering it was that the subtext after the title read: "An impartation of practical keys to unlocking your divine book-writing destiny." After reading that I was almost convinced.

This book probably would have looked so fancy or had been so intriguing if it wasn't for the fact that I had just had a conversation with Justin over delicious coffee about wanting to pursue and challenge myself more creatively, and I knew that meant I needed to start writing. But not just talking about it anymore, because ask my friends and family--I have been talking about it for years. My New Years resolution for 4 years in a row was to write and book and finish it.

I knew as the words were coming out of mouth and as I was expressing myself about what I should be doing--that God would give me the tools to do it. It is so pressing upon my heart that I just need to get started! If though I'm not quite sure what that means yet.

So let me tell you about this super cool book. It helps to break down my ideas into little boxes and sort out my thoughts strategically so I can work on putting it all into an outline. It's a 'write in' book so I get to not only read about it but start writing stuff down right away! This is my first day. I am excited to start it. I feel like God gave it to me and He was just like, "Melissa, here you go...now start writing!"

As of right now my writing will be purposeful if it's meant to be, but if not, it's not. I am no longer going to put pressure on myself to just write amazing life changing things--because God tells me every day that I already have what it takes and that I just need to step out and trust him. I'm excited about my new challenge for myself.

Justin, (my husband) and Lauren, (my best friend who lives in Cali) are my accountability people to keep me on it. Justin likes to be my little editor and he's good at it so I suck it up and let him edit my stuff, even though I don't love it. He doesn't change what I write though, he just give's me lectures about you're and your and their and there's and how these words sound the same but are used differently. I love my husband, but he is a mr. smarty pants. I have learned so much from him though and he inspires me. I know it's just because he wants me to be the best writer that I can be, and I love him for that! I should be happy he's willing to help me and be involved! God placed him in my life to be my help mate right? Sometimes I am just stubborn and I think he's just trying to correct me and tell me what to do. But sometimes we need more correction in our lives so we can be better, you know?

An inspiration for my writing this week (which I am going to try to list every week): Justin and I have been reading a book called, "A Million Miles in a Thousand Years" by Donald Miller. He is such a real and down to earth writer. His writing is amusing at times and easy to read, yet there is a lot of substance to it. I thought while Justin was reading aloud to me, I am really enjoying this guys writing and he is just talking about his day. But he wasn't just talking about his day, he was talking about what he got out of the day, what impacted him, what struck him funny, what hurt him, and what he felt like God was showing him. Then I thought, I can write like that. I do write like that! I just need to do it.

Side note:I am listening to Tenth Avenue North and Starfield and I'm finding it very inspiring. If you, (the reader) need to do any creative work, I highly recommend it. Also, Brooke Fraser's new album, "Flags" is amazing!